Well…it’s official. I’m knee deep in a pile of very costly crap…and it’s about to hit the fan alright. Right now in less than 5 days, I have to finish about 30 articles to be published for work. Yes…you are reading that right. 30 articles in about 96 hours. I even have problems trying to write my blog everyday and I need to finish 30 articles by the end of the week?
I know I asked for a distraction alright.
But this is ridiculous.
Then again…I supposed because I need the money, this is something that has to be done already. If I’m supposed to get paid to write, the by all means let’s make this worth every letter right? At least with all the things I need to write, I can put her at just behind that part of my mind for the time being. Which is a good thing though…
Because I don’t think it’s going to end anytime soon.
I guess things like this is bound to happen to two people who are intertwined in a reality that is equally nightmarish in our own eyes. When one hurts, so does the other and vice versa. Two people feeding of the pain, frustration and solitude that we impose on each other. Each building up their own wall of self-denial and regret in the hopes that whatever pain of loss both of us feel will pass soon enough and we can go on with our lives living with the empty hole where we cored out our heart from.
Sounds like a cheerful sort of story doesn’t it?
Like we’ve said before in one of our long conversations post-breakup – It’s almost like a movie that’s so sad. If there is any consolidation to this story so far is that I can smile at the fact that even a guy like me can hold on to something so good even if it’s for a brief moment in time.
It shows that there is some good in this world for us to have. That at least heaven can indeed be right here on Earth just waiting for us to discover and build up on.
Maybe I won’t find that slice of heaven again for the rest of my life. Maybe I will. I don’t know. I can’t even tell whether or not I’ll be able to finish 30 articles in 4 days. All I know is I’ve got something to do and like those articles, I’ll make every moment worth it. Without regrets and without stopping.
Because it’s something I need to do.
To live life for more than you want.
To live life because you need to be alive.
To live life because there is no way to go but foward.