It’s finally getting somewhat warmer and I’m feeling a whole lot better. The morning ritual of couging my lungs out to dislodge every ounce of phlem in there seems to be working. I also think that last post in the blog did some good anyway…but I sudder to think that I sacrificed something to turn the tides round a bit.
Which could turn out to be a bad thing
But that’s for another day.
Come to think of it, it’s hard to put into picture that a man born out of science like myself would be engrossed in things that are completely unscientific. When you look at it, for those of you who do know me…you know this is true. Of all the hardcore science from DNA extraction to bacteria culturing to high-explosive manufacturing that I have done, in the end, the parts that only matter are the ones that have nothing to do with science.
They are the ones that help alot.
I mean…let’s take the few things I’m involved in.
For a guy who doesn’t believe in organised religions this has got to be the most baffling obsession of all. But three things sums them up for me. Duty, aid and observation. No other symbolism can compare to their allegiance to their cause. They watch us, they help us, they remain anomymous. It’s a role model for what some of us do or have the need to do. They are the true soldiers for something worth fighting for…no matter how far they have fallen from the path.
Not so much as the cause and effect of science, but the cause and effect of something completely unrelated. Like if I punch someone today for no reason, would I get sick tomorrow because I did? The events that happen to us happen for a reason whether payback or a prelude to something else. If I suffer now for no reason it means I get something back in return and vice versa. Pretty logical…but completely unscientific.
Slightly different from karma, completely different from destiny. This is from the plethora of coincedences that I have faced in my life. The right places at the right time. The many “nick of time” events that come in at the last possible moments and saved my butt. You know this is what I talk about most often on how things come to remind me of what I should be doing or what is going on at the moment. Call it luck…but hey I’m a man of science. There os no such thing as luck.
So there we are. The things that make completely no sense to the objective mind but I still hold true to them anyway. I know I shouldn’t…every part of my science driven mind screams for me to cast it off like a gangrene body part.
It has saved me more than once in ways too unbelievable to explain. It’s helped people out on more than several occassions. It in itself is its own miracle. Something I haven’t been able to fully comprehend or explain yet. Maybe in time I’ll be able to put it down to science.
I’d be much more at peace when I do.
But until then…I’d just have to hold on to it as part of a life I lead.
Something more than the machine of an existence I already lead.
Maybe there really is hope in the end yet.