Last Words

She was half rushing to catch the train on the platform. Her bags packed and loaded on the baggage. Her goodbyes to people already said. There was no looking back now, until she boarded the train leaving me standing on the platform, leaving me my last final words to her.

"You know you didn't hug me goodbye."

Her face twisted in uncertain realization as the doors closed. What came after, I didn't stay to see. I turned around and walked away. Half regretting, half hating the events that have unfolded. My self loathing peaked as the train pulled away from the station, taking with it a friend I never wanted to part with.

For the first time in a while, I couldn't be the person I've always made myself be. I couldn't be the smooth talking charmer that people always relied on for comfort. For the first time in a while, I felt like I was back in high school, hating the world for things out of my control. For the first time, farewells would be different. For the first time, I could not shed a tear.

For the first time, the last words I uttered would be the worst thing never be said again.

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    [...] as chaotic and convoluted as they are, are far from being ones that readily expressed. The loss of my emotional outlet seems to have put a damper on my ability to connect with people and connect with [...]

6 People Said A Couple Of Things: »

  • Gravatarcooper wrote from  United States on August 13, 2007 at 05:42 and said:

    Just stopped by to read Kami. Sometimes there are no words to say,so one must just read.

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  • GravatarTracey wrote from  New Zealand on August 13, 2007 at 16:15 and said:

    Everything I can think of to say…I cannot say simply because even in my own mind it sounds harsh. This is not the time for harsh so I will say only this

    If you want to talk…I am here.

    Comment Permalink

  • GravatarKamigoroshi wrote from  Australia on August 13, 2007 at 16:49 and said:

    Cooper: Sometimes there aren’t enough words in the world to describe the feelings involved.

    Tracey: I know you are. :)

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  • GravatarChickyBabe wrote from  Australia on August 13, 2007 at 18:18 and said:

    I was that girl, but in a different context. My best friend and I were parting ways, probably never to see each other again, and she refused to hug me and say goodbye. You brought it all back…

    Comment Permalink

  • GravatarKamigoroshi wrote from  Australia on August 13, 2007 at 22:16 and said:

    I hope it wasn’t too painful a memory ChickyBabe. I wouldn’t want to turn you melancholic all the time. :(

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  • Gravatarbunnyrose wrote from  Malaysia on August 13, 2007 at 22:16 and said:

    Edrei sometime its difficult to say goodbye….lest it become too emotional.

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