As twilight gives way to the sun’s brightening rays, my mind wanders back and forth between the past that got me here and the futures I might have to take. Curled up against the softness of my only companion in the darkness, I let the silence wash over me, diluting my thoughts with an echo of questions only the retreating night can give.
“Have I gone this far?”
“What do I do next?”
“How much further do I have to go?”
“Should I go pee right now?”
Yet, despite all the questions, waiting to be resolved, there is a thought at the back of my head that’s not sunk in. Something so big that I still can’t wrap my fingers around it. Even if the world around you were a wonder you could never comprehend, sometimes the greatest things are ones that miraculously come out of your own pocket. For that, I do think it’s going to take more than a night to digest it all. Some moments after all are meant to be savored with the realization that they happened out of your own effort. No ambrosia could taste any sweeter than such victories, no matter how small.
That being said, as of yesterday I have finished 5 years worth of 2 bachelor degrees. As of today I have started inching my way up the ladder towards my goal by starting an honours degree. As of tomorrow, well…one thing at a time.
I wonder if, in a years time, would I still be curled up in bed in the morning twilight wondering what should I do next, unable to comprehend the obstacles that I have dug through and have yet to climb over? That’s only for time to tell. For now at least, the only think I can be sure off in the morning is that I still need to get up and pee. You shouldn’t put off priorities so they say.
I can’t argue with that.