Is there something in my life’s file that has to say “Must be constantly face with insurmountable odds”? It always seems like every time I juggle one problem in my life, another one pops out to ruin what could have been a great day.
Nothing ever comes out easy for me, because there would always be something that goes wrong somewhere that doesn’t have a usual solution to the problem. More than half the time, whatever that needs to be solved needs that alternate perspective that I’ve grown so good at coming up with. Even so, just for once, could it feel like I’ve taken the usual road? Just for once, is that too much to ask?
I say this now because after that little fiasco which was moving to a new webhost in so short a notice, I now have to move where I live. For those of you who don’t know, that’s a whole lot harder than just backing up all your files and transferring them to a new place while you wait comfortably on your chair. It’s a whole lot more tedious too given that we have to look at every house we want, on foot, knowing that for everyone else that turns up will be a potential person we have to compete against for the house.
Nothing is ever that simple in a year where I need everything else in my life to be simple. But don’t get me wrong, it’s not that it can’t be handled. I know somewhere down the line, this will all settle down. I know somewhere down the line there is a solution. What I really want to know is whether somewhere down that line is a place where I can rest my weary head without thinking of the hundred and one problems that would otherwise plague my walking existence.
I don’t mind the fact I am constantly fighting for something, for anything, for everything. I just want to know that there are always breaks in the middle. Because no one, at least no one human can keep doing this and stay sane for long. People wonder how do I keep putting up with everything that comes my way. Maybe that’s because I might no longer be sane. Or maybe that’s because I might no longer be human.
Strangely enough, that’s not a problem for me. It could be a problem for a whole lot of people though, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Just like me.
Just like everyone else.