Sometimes I don't know why I bother going out to meet up with people when I know more likely than not, they are going to blow me over especially at the very last minute.

Yet, does the fact that I know it's going to happen mean I'm always better prepared for it or does it mean I have a very low esteem of the people in my life?

You still have to ask me how is it I've become much more accustomed and comfortable to the lack of human contact for ridiculously long periods of time.

With people like this in my life. Do you really have to keep asking?