Lousy Days

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s alright, it happens all the time.”

Yes it happens all the time and while I shouldn’t be feeling any more down and out than I already am, it’s hard not to. There are a lot of things on my shoulder right now and while that usually isn’t cause for concern, the lack of finding something to take my mind off things is once again taking its toll on me.

The only optimistic thing here is that I’m so engrossed in my work for most of the day that I hardly find the time to worry about the things that go wrong, instead do whatever I can to compensate for the lack of needful things. It’s just that when the sun goes down, I find myself taking my work home with me in an effort to stave off the inevitable sense of isolation and helplessness that’s wrapped about me like a cloak. So much so that I have foregone sleep in the attempt not to spend those few moments lying there in bed wishing for someone to walk me through the night.

Is a friend to talk to too much to ask in times of need?

7 thoughts on “Lousy Days

  1. This field gives us a purpose. As long as our attention remains fixated on it, we’d numb the feeling of isolation. No, a friend to talk with isn’t too much to ask for.

  2. The problem is numbing or even forgetting that you’re even isolated revolves around the need for you to be constantly wrapped around what you’re fixated on, not many people can be that obsessed over something 24/7. The mind needs to shut off and those are the times I dread.

  3. The way I see it, need and want are two separate things. That’s why I usually make it clear of what I need and what I want because they don’t usually coincide. Needful things are least keep me going. It is either my job to do them and do them at all cost, I will. Wantful things keep me content and happy, those are the things I usually lack. It doesn’t make it easy, but sometimes when I bury myself in the quest for needful things, it isn’t so hard either.

  4. At times it is. I know it’s not the answer you want to hear, but such is life sometimes. Those whom you expect to be around for you aren’t. Our expectations from others can make us feel worse if they don’t come through. I’m only telling it as it is. It’s beyond our control when it involves others.

  5. Maybe it’s an answer I understand too well. I am aware its beyond my control. I accept that this is part of life. It gets harder to remind yourself each and every time that it’s a normal thing for you, but when people around you don’t seem to have that problem, you’ve got to ask yourself…is this life or is this just your life?

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