Sometimes I'd like to believe that the harder things come by, the sweeter the reward. That's just the way I'm wired. I might not have the toughest of life to live, but I cannot escape the perception that nothing in my life is subject to conventional questions with conventional solutions. It's probably why I never had any conventional fix to any problem no matter how everyday it might be.

Yet there are days when I have to wonder if there is a point to taking to long hard road. Whether my envy can be satisfied by simply giving in to what everyone calls "the normal life"? If anything, simply giving in is a new concept for me. Simply giving up everything I've worked hard to build is something I wouldn't even consider.

To friends who have asked me to stop fighting in order to be happy, I can think of no other reason to say yes. If anything, I will always wonder, could I be any happier than as I walk that complicated line?

Doesn't take much to know the answer. It does however take a while to wonder why I asked the question in the first place.