You can’t help it sometimes that people don’t understand the things that you go through. It’s only natural unless you walk in the same shoes of the person. Sometimes it gets to you so much but there is only little you can expect in return from people who know almost nothing about how to hold you up in your state.
It’s just a sad world that way.
But you can’t help it either way can you? It’s like how I don’t really understand how it’s like for you to bear the scars of your genes and expect a dire future from it later on in life. I can’t really say I understand because in truth I can’t. All I can do is what I know how to do and hope it’s enough for your sake.
Then again there are people out there with lives so different from the masses that its almost impossible for you to sympathise with them because really…unless you walked the live of a child who lives in war or a child born out of abuse or just suffer an irreversible hand of fate from everyone…how could you say things any better than what they would have tried?
How could you really stand by them?
Which is something I always have been asking myself ever since I’ve been in the line I’ve been. I mean…those of you who know me well enough know I have this sort of passion when it comes to lending a hand to people…so much so that it has become a feverish duty and responsibility on my part to push on.
Throughout the years I have kept on doing this, I have made mistakes and I have learnt from them. I have bled with others and I have laughed with them. I have given eulogies at a good friends funeral and I am a Godfather to the children of another friend. In the end though, people have changed by my hand for better or worse.
In no part in all of that have I ever said I understand how they feel when it comes to the time when I don’t. Even though I have had a lot of pain and tears in my life, even though I have been hit harder than the people I am around with in general…there are friends in my life I would never pretend to understand how they have been through. There are darker things in this world.
Some I have not faced first hand.
All I can do is share their burdens and hold them up in spirit if not in answer. It’s the same way I expect people to see me as. If there is anything I learnt from those who have their own burdens to bear is that no one needs someone to feel sorry for them, no one needs other people to state the obvious and give them answers to things they already know. If there is anything I learnt from others…it’s the fact all you can do is share all their pain and share it with the same dignity and stance they stand by.
It’s a lesson I learnt well.
It’s the least I can do as a friend. It’s the least I can do when the rest of the world doesn’t have the strength to share your burdens. It’s the least I can do when the rest of the world isn’t ready to listen to what you have to say.
That at least I can say I say I understand how you feel. I can at least say I understand how it’s like to hide away the parts of yourself from the world because you can’t find another soul ready enough to share it to. That at least I can say I understand what its like to feel cut off from the world even though you’re surrounded by others.
Sometimes you have to realise you can’t help the people you’re with, but that doesn’t mean you have nothing to share in common. Being a friend is all about relating what you two share between each other even through the hard times.
Sometimes you don’t have to go through it to be there for them. What matters is that you’re there for them with everything you got. It doesn’t matter if it hurts you, it matters only that it takes away a little of their pain to listen and talk to them like a normal person in spite of themselves.
As a friend, you owe it to them to be a friend.
As a friend, you owe it to youself to never stop caring.
After all…isn’t that what friends are for?