I wonder what it would be like to be a parent. I know it’s something people like me at this time in life won’t usually think about, but that hasn’t stopped me before. Seriously though, I wonder what its like for me of all people to have kids of my own. Knowing what I know…living what I have been living. They say that having kids of your own changes everything in your life.
I wonder how much would it change in mine.
I think it’s just a matter of would I carry on the sins of my parents onto my kids. I think that’s one of every parents nightmares…at least expecting and budding parents. For me at least, I never really had parent who were supportive of me…heck…I never had parents who were there for me to begin with. So the question that really bugs me in the end is that if I have very bad social skills to begin with.
Would I pass that on to my kids?
If anything, I already swore so many times that I would NEVER raise my kids the same way my parents “raised” me. Money is important yeah…but for the love of God, I would never want my kids to be alone in the dark night during their troubled times. I would never want them to be without the advices in the times when they are absolutely clueless on things. I would never hurt them for the things they tried their best and failed at.
Never again will that happen in my life.
Maybe in part is the fact I want them to be the best they can be as themselves, not the best I want them to be. Ok fine…so I might want to reengineer their genes to be faster, stronger and smarter and of course, which parent doesn’t in some way want their own kids to carry on their legacy and make it better from it…but in the end they are still people that will grow up to make their own decisions and paint their own life on their blank canvas.
I trust myself to raise my kids with the awareness of the world that carries with it the responsibility for such knowledge. The only difference between them and me is that I will always be there for them when they want me. When the time comes for them to shoulder the responsibility and burden of all the knowledge and awareness that comes with my legacy.
They’ll always have me by them.
That’s a promise really…to they who are yet unborn. They’ll always have me by them. To trust them to do what’s better. To give them the boost when they need it. To fight with them when we all need to learn something. To laugh with them about our lives. To raise them to be the best they can be by themselves and with other people.
That’s a promise.
One I will never let go.
Not as long as I still draw breath.