“And you don’t like that?”
“Well it rubs heads against people, especially when I decide to distance myself from their norm and live in my own world. I don’t really like all that loneliness.”
It’s easy to get lost in a world full of false beauty and attributes. We spend so much time pandering to our own strengths, pretending that our weaknesses are things that don’t exist that we buy into our own sense of invincibility. But are our own weaknesses really weaknesses because it inhibits us from being truly great or are they weaknesses because we don’t like it in ourselves?
It’s hard to know what that really is when the world keeps imposing upon you their version of good and bad. That if we look and smell like this, we could be dating swimsuit models. That if we look and smell like this, we could be swimsuit models. That for every thought and every action carries with it a public sanctioned moral authority where some things can be said and some things shouldn’t be thought of. The irony of which are the same part of the public who encourages you to “be true to yourself and bring out the inner beauty in you”. Epic hypocrisy.
You know, I wish I have a solution that can be worded into eloquent sentences, but I don’t. I battle the same thing over and over again in my life as you do. I face the same social and cultural quagmire as the millions of people out there. Each fighting for their own sense of independence, and at the same time, each trying hard not to be the one person island.
Thing is, I made my choice a long time ago and with those choices, come the consequences of my actions. I do not necessarily like them, but they are what I have to live with if I am to be as true to myself as I can. In this world at least, you need some measure of conviction and purpose to stay yourself in spite of what the world tells you to become.
To that end, maybe that is the solution. We stay our guns and face off the consequences of our choices. We pick the battles that we can fight and the battles that are worth fighting. Everything else should be inconsequential. Whether you can live with your own face in the mirror after that is pretty much it. But at least you know that the choices you made are the ones you decided for yourself in your own terms. In this world of false beauty and attributes, that is a rarity of the highest regard. It makes for some of the most interesting people.
People I really wouldn’t mind having a little fun with over and over again.