When Changes Affect A Relationship

We all change. That’s a given. For better or for worse, we either change ourselves as a result of the world around us, or the world around us changes to a point where it recognises us as something different. It’s something we cannot hide away from.

As individuals, how we change determines the series of events in our lives. The responsibility that we take and the results that play out. For the most part, it affects us and a small part of the life around us. Everything else is swept away in the ever shifting tides of life, becoming part of the background series of events that most people pay no attention to.

Yet what happens when two lives that are bonded by the compatibility of the moment begin to change?

Whether it be friendship or love, no longer does that change affect just us. When two worlds overlap, change can always throw that compatibility out of balance. People can be torn between keeping what they have grown comfortable with or reaching out and becoming what they have grown to be. Change on one or both sides can lead to the eventual separation as roads diverge apart from one another. Maybe for friendships which come and go, that thought isn’t so bad. But for a love that has become your world, could any one of us so easily accept those changes and move on?

Logically and inevitably, we have to accept them. We have to accept that we either have to change to keep complementing our partners or we drift apart and let go. In a way, the prospect seems so…out of control. That the choices you have rarely are the ones you like. But when you reach that point in the relationship when you know both of you are in love, you have to realise that it isn’t about you anymore. It isn’t about you making the sacrifices. It’s also about them contending with same choices as well. It’s also about them making their own sacrifices at the same time.

If both sides realise this simple selfless act of devotion. If both of realise that you aren’t doing this for yourself or for the other, but for each other, then maybe change isn’t so bad. You just have to realise that you’d be taking a completely different route in life. One that holds things you probably haven’t seen or experienced before. The best thing about it is, when you both change together, for each other, you’ll keep sharing those new experiences. Never alone to face them.

How can you say then, that change in a relationship would most likely be a bad thing?

2 thoughts on “When Changes Affect A Relationship

  1. Well written bro.. it’s one thing to realize that love isn’t about finding the best mate, but about being the best one. It’s another finding someone else that thinks the same way.. Sigh.. 🙂

  2. FoOie: If there is one thing I’ve learned out of all this is that regardless of it all, “best” is a matter of perspective. It’s far more important not to remain stagnant in the face of life. Live, for better or for worse. When you grow and find that there are people growing along with you, there is a connection that can be shared.

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